“Like all explorers, we are drawn to discover what’s out there without knowing yet if we have the courage to face it.” – Pema Chodron
Isn’t it amazing how much just plain courage it takes to live in our society? It seems we all hope for some sort of fairy tale life and often deny reality.
We want friends who are always upbeat, go along with whatever we want, never ask any more of us than we want to give, never hurt our feelings, always agree with us, you can add your own wishes to the list.
Perfect parents. That is a fairy tale! Somewhere I read we are all wounded children having been raised by wounded children. Most parents, not all, do the best they can from their state of awareness. It’s almost like life is set up for us to learn some of our greatest lessons from our parents’ mistakes. I know I certainly have. And, I expect my children have.
Our spouse or partner is a human being doing the best they can to make it through life. Just like us. They are not a prince or a princess in a fairy tale. Just a human being. Screwing up. Doing brilliant things. Filled with love. And, fear. Happiness and remorse. They are the source of great joy and great pain. And, the whole range of human behavior and emotion.
We are all total and complete. Lacking nothing. Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker. The good witch and the bad witch. Heaven and hell. Dark and light. Truth and fiction. Clarity and illusion. You get the idea.
Sometimes we choose the path of courage – sometimes the path of denial or escape.
And, through it all “we are drawn to discover what’s out there.”
Mostly, courage is needed to face ourselves. That’s always the hardest part.
If I perceive I’ve been harmed, how am I coping with that perception? Do I become a victim and carry the hurt with me my whole life? Does the hurt become who I am? Do I learn, become stronger, happier and more at peace? Choices. Responsibility. Sounds harsh. And, I guess, coming from the place of wanting life to be a fairy tale, it is harsh.
It’s also the only way to healing, happiness, peace and joy.